If I will pursue filmmaking, I cannot think of any better
partner than Kim. We do not always concur on concepts, but we always arrive at common
conclusions, after each friendly battle. Kim is naturally a humorist, if not an
absurdist; she excels in the art of ridicule—far better than the celebrated
Zafra. Her alphabet consists of fresh paradoxes, and she juggles them with
precision, creating a string of jaw-dropping flair.

 

This entry proudly introduces the first part of the ambitious
project Kim and I agreed upon to pen. A product of a brainstorm in YM, this is
not the first of the many bizarre products brought by our combined witticism. (The
single-scene marathon of nose-picking-turned-self-mutilation, arrested by Liszt’s
Mephisto Waltz behind a great white canvass, remains to be my favorite.)

 

Below is not a shared concept, I expect that Kim has a better
(I mean wittier by better) idea of how to stir the interests of the audience within
the first few rolls. Anyway, here’s a piece of my contribution for the said
project:

 

 

(Full cast in chorus, looking straight up to the camera,
thirty degrees angled to the west)  “Our dear viewers, we would like to stress
three things first before we could go on amuse you with our brand of entertainment.
First, this is an art film, unless you know what is meant by art I recommend
that you do not finish this. Art is not always entertaining, Jim Carey is.
True. It is not accidental that this sounds like a Lemony Snicket warning, we
are really concerned that the sheer oddity of this film may lead you into a
suicidal state of mind. But worry less since a recent scientific research
suggests that a dose of Adam Sandler can remedy neurotic disturbances films
like this one cause. Two, unbeknownst to you dear folks, we are unpaid
non-actors here in a non-commercial effort, so we are less obliged to act
convincingly; after all, this film is not made to convince you for nothing. Our
purpose is just to disturb you; we are not here to tell any story, we are not
here to make any relevance. This is pure Dadaism put into motion picture; we
promise, shortly after this, we can all be happy again. And finally, we give
you enough time to reflect and reconsider watching this, despite our cautions, and
see for yourself what we may accidentally mean, or what you may accidentally
find in this obscure little charade.

 

“Back to your posts!” from somewhere shouts the writer. (reading
their scripts, each of them will hurry to their respective places) (after all
is set—freeze frame) (eleven seconds of cosmos murmur then the background
music plays, preferably an unfamiliar tune or an original composition, while
the camera takes snapshots of each of the cast raising flashcards that bear their
names for the opening credits) (everyone smiles).

 

-This is originally written in Filipino-.

 

 

I won’t discuss the entire plot here for the sake of
business. But let me remind you that our business is not of capitalistic
nature. We do this primarily because we seek attention. If I speak about the
plot this early, you might as well give up on us this early. Your attention, or
better still, your appreciation is our business. We are postmodern artists in
search of mature audience. See you in YOUTUBE, back us up on this.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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